Guess I'm not motivated enough to keep this thing up. Oh well. Also, I suck really bad, and don't feel like posting my repeated failures at anything poker related. My SNG magic has apparently left me, as I can't even beat the $16 turbos on Stars, so it's mostly been splashing around in tournaments and random sessions of SNGs, Stud8, and LHE. Slowly bleeding money away until I randomly go somehwat deep in a tournament and make up some of what I lost. Alas, it only prolongs the eventual brokeski-ing.

In other news, I began 8 tabling whilst doing my SNGs, which was hilarious because my computer really can't handle it. Might explain my poor performances though, since maybe I can't handle it either, but meh, it's rather intense and kind of a good time until you bubble four tournaments in four hands. Then you cry. Then you reload four more. Nyuk nyuk nyuk.

It would appear that my motivation to succeed at poker has all but left me, so it's probably a good thing that I'm just messing around with small potatos and don't have a few grand online like I did last time I lost my motivation. That went poorly. I still enjoy it to some degree, but any notion of making money at this game has flown out the window. I'm sure if I were more disciplined and took it more seriously, I could be a winning player, and the past has proven that I think, having built decent rolls up a couple times, only to withdraw a chunk then piss away the rest. Lifetime I would say I'm up, though not by much, which I'm fine with at this point. I don't need to make mirrions to enjoy what I'm doing like I used to think. It used to be all about make money win money move up make more win more keep moving up. Now it's kinda meh, yeah I guess I'll go play 3/6 Stud8 with a $500 bankroll. Oh $30 tournament? Giddyup. Do what I want within reason so I don't blow my entire roll in 10 minutes, but be flexible and have fun with it. I'm sure also that if I were still able to play poker all the time I'd be more into it and more serious about it, but not being able to play for four months at a time makes you rethink what you want to get out of the game. Side cash is nice, but maybe I just want to blow off steam for a month while I'm on vacation. Probably kind of tough to not play for a few months then jump right back into 5/10 online too.

This ended up being a lot longer and more scatterbrained than I had intended. Oops. Only really meant to do that first paragraph as a quick update. The things you end up doing when you have had nothing to do for a month.